Posted: December 28, 2025   •   Posted in: Discussions

Hope not Hate: A discussion

A recent lunch time discussion held at Beccles Meeting House focussed on the concept of rooting one’s life in hope whilst acknowledging all those things which we ‘hate’ in the world as it is.

We started by listening to the mission statement of Hope not Hate, an NGO on line which :..’challenges racism, hatred and extremism in all its forms, while supporting community, peace, solidarity and collaboration.

A second source was a quote from the novel by Elif Sharak, called Rivers in the Sky (a novel to be greatly recommended):

‘Hatred is a poison served in 3 cups:

1. When people despise those they secretly desire
2. Where people loathe those they do not understand
3. When people hate those they have hurt or are hurting.’

We then took sometime in silence to consider individually what the word ‘ hate ‘ means to us., and to write down one or two words which came to mind .When we shared those words there was great commonality amongst the group  – that which was  hated was : inequality, selfishness, disrespect for the other, denigration of other races, intolerance ,  racism, injustice, prejudice, the abuse of power, pomposity, arrogance, greed, cruelty, cheating, corruption, war  and inhumanity in all its forms. This exercise made us realise just why we are Quakers trying to follow the Quaker Way.

We listened to The Poison Tree, a poem by William Blake, the first two stanzas of which read:

‘I was angry with my friend,

I spoke my wrath, my wrath did end.

I was angry with my foe ,I spoke it not

My wrath did grow…’

We agreed that anger and fear not acknowledged underpin feeligs of hate, but that these can be overcome with openness and courage, trusting the other to understand. There was a great deal of trust within the group, and hopefully we left with a greater awareness of how important it is not to deny difference, but accept and welcome it, never allowing it to to end in division and conflict.

We ended the session reminding ourselves of the Cherokee fable: the Story of the Two Wolves.

An old Cherokee is speaking to his grandson about life:

A fight is going on inside me, he said to the boy, it is a terrible fight, and it’s between two wolves.

One is evil – he is anger, envy, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego.

The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.

The grandson thought for a minute, then asked ‘Which wolf won?

The grandfather answered simply, ‘The one you feed’.

Ours is the choice, ours the responsibility to work to make the world a better place.

Jenny F (Beccles Quakers)